By ANDY aka GHoooSTS
Seas on 5 is the dawn of a new era for CommanderCast, one of all new music. With this dawning, we also come across a new problem… we lose the infamous ‘Fight To The Death’ music from the original Star Trek episode Amok Time, where Spock and Kirk engage in a spectacular battle to the death. Since the original air date, this tune has been imbured with DEEP meaning: the time for fucking around has come to an end. This was ‘shit just got real’ before Martin Lawrence said it standing up slowly while a helicopter flew overhead. If you can’t understand the gravity of this song (you poor, culturally-bankrupt zombie), then here’s a crash course:

So, like I said, this song is kind of a ‘break in case of emergency’ joint, only to be unleashed when signifying the most serial of bidness is about to transpire. Thusly, I used it as the jump off for the ‘Free-For-All Roundtable’ where we would discuss contentious issues on the Commander scene since Season One. Well… now, we need a new flag that serious business is incoming, and it’s time to drop the civil debate and fight like animals… VERBOSE animals.

Towards this end, I turn to the CommanderCast audience. After three epic contests, tons of e-mails, and the greatest thing I’ve ever seen the Magic community do, I have no doubts y’all will rise to the occasion. I need you guys to provide me with a new song to kick off the Free-For-All Roundtable. Towards this end, only a Battle of the Bands will suffice.

Perhaps you’re thinking, “I don’t have a band!” Don’t worry, you don’t need one. I’ll take anything that provides a throwback to that old Star Trek fight music; a chiptune, a keyboard cover, or even just a bunch of people sitting around a mic going “dun dun DUNNNN DUNNNN DUNNNN DUNNNN DUNNNN-” etc. But as long as it’s awesome, I’ll use it!

Here’s the contest instructions! Be advised these can change at any time (usually as I think up new things I need).

RULES/INSTRUCTIONS

1) Make a piece of music. This part has a few sub-rules:

  • Any genre or style is cool, and you can make it however you want (Mario Paint?). It just needs to invoke that awesome ‘fight to the death’ music feel.
  • It has to be at least 30 seconds long, and has to have a definitive beginning and end. No endless loops please.
  • No lyrics. CommanderCast’s music is strictly ‘instrumental-only’. You can use VOICES, but no lyrics.
  • I don’t care how you do it, but it needs to be Creative Commons safe. This means you might be able to mix up some other music, but it’s probably safest to make your own.

2) Bundle your music up into an MP3. This is the only format I will accept. I will not take .zip files or other archives, and I won’t take any weird-ass .ewj file extensions or what have you. MP3 only. If you know how to make music, this should be easy. Even if you don’t know anything about making music, this should still be easy.

3) E-Mail me it by January 18, 2012: CommanderCast(at)gmail(dot)com with the subject heading ‘Season 5 Contest’. When you do this, please include explicit permission for me to use your music. Realize that by sending the song to me, you’re effectively giving it to me and I’ll edit it, potentially chop it up, use it endlessly, and abuse it in ways you might have never dreamed possible. It’s not like I can restrict you from using the original, so this shouldn’t be a big deal. January 18th is the submission deadline.

4) With to be showered with praise and prizes.

EVALUATION

How will we determine the winner? By a CIRCLE OF JUDGMENT, of course! This is a pretty fickle criteria, but I’ll definitely be awarding points to whichever song best captures the feel of the old music. Simply making something clever and well-composed will go a long way; having a clean sound that doesn’t grate the ears will be nice. Really, it’s just a question of which ones myself and the staff like.

PRIZES

Perhaps you know of Derfington, aka CommanderCast’s Grand Imperial Archduke of Pimpology? Oh, then you no doubt are familiar with his extensive history of taking a normal card and transforming it into a straight-up artistic beast. Well, the winner will get a card of their choice EXPOSED to Derfington’s disgusting sick skills with the art tools (of death). This means one alter done by David Lee, for which I will pick up the bill and mail it to you. You pick the card (something worth less than $10; if you want something more expensive, then we’ll make arrangements).

Runner up prizes? Well… they’ll be available. I’m still deciding on them/making secret arrangements for them. These will be announced soon.

WHAT ELSE DO YOU NEED TO KNOW?

If you have questions e-mail me directly; CommanderCast(at)gmail(dot)com and good luck!