378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_nSo as you my have heard on this week’s episode of Commandercast (and if you haven’t, go listen to it now! The whole Commandercast.com staff is on to review the precons and make penis jokes at each others’ expense), we have put out the call to the Commandercast listeners to cast their vote for which new precon commander we are are going to put through a deck building gauntlet.

One general will go through every writer’s column over the course of two to three weeks, with the end result being a freakish Frankensteinian chimera of all our different deck building styles. What fun!

But maybe you’re still undecided regarding which general you want to cast your vote for. Cool, I’ve got something to help with that. Today I am going to go through all of the precon generals and give a quick synopsis of what I think their best deckbuilds are, as well as preview two cards that I am going to try and fit into the deck should you pick it as our contender for the gauntlet. (Sorry, can’t do more than two cards. You wouldn’t want me to give away all the upcoming tech now, would you?)

Ten generals? And two cards each? Oh, I am just going to make it rain tech!

Ten generals? And two cards each? Oh, I am just going to make it rain tech!

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This entry is part 7 of 7 in the series Up! Your! Deck!

378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_nIn order to review the new Commander 2013 product for Commandercast.com’s upcoming theme week, I was asked (actually ordered. You could even say I was… Commanded) to play an unaltered preconstructed deck, so that I could accurately assess its worth for the site’s fans. In my case I was assigned the Jund deck, and I went out to test it against some of the 1 on 1 decks Ottawa has to offer.

Not since American History X have I born witness to such a vicious curb stomping.

At least the guys beating me didn't have swastika tattoos. I think.

At least the guys beating me didn’t have swastika tattoos. I think.

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This entry is part 6 of 7 in the series Up! Your! Deck!

378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_nIt’s Vorthos week on commmandercast.com, where we take time out to talk about the guys who really just want to play their sea monster Wrexial, the Risen Deep deck and be left alone. Vorthos are players who play for the flavour of Magic, who don’t really care if their deck is winning as long as it all makes thematic sense.

Basically, they are the sort of player who would never read one of my articles.

But I love Vorthos all the same. Vorthos players make some of the most fun and hilarious decks around, and the fact that they aren’t particularly competitive means they usually have some of the best sportsmanship at the table (please note my use of the word ‘usually’ in the last sentence). Vorthos serves as great reminder to everybody that this is just a game, and we should all just relax and have fun.

But this article series isn’t about relaxing, it’s about building a stronger deck. So here is my gift to Vorthos: a list of my favourite mono-colour generals that can wipe the board out while staying totally in character.

Unfortunately, none of these generals are known to LARP. So here is a picture of Peter Dinklage doing it instead!

Unfortunately, none of these generals are known to LARP. So here is a picture of Peter Dinklage doing it instead!

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This entry is part 5 of 7 in the series Up! Your! Deck!

378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_nWell done, Eric. So much for getting this article up last week. Y’know, like you said you would. 

You freaking dunce.

No, it’s cool. I can totally fix this!

How’s that? Did you not post the article because you were too busy building a time machine? That you can now use to go back and post the article?

… Noooo.

WELL THEN WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO, GENIUS!?

I was thinking I could make it up to them by giving them a preview of an upcoming theme week? In addition to the article?

… That might work. Maybe.

Okay, how about a preview, an article, and a deck list?

Alright, that will have to do. Oh, and Eric?

What?

Stop talking to yourself. It’s frigging weird.

I don't know what he's talking about, man. Seems perfectly healthy to me.

I don’t know what he’s talking about, man. Seems perfectly healthy to me.

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This entry is part 4 of 7 in the series Up! Your! Deck!

378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_nAgh! My deck building series is being interrupted by a theme week! Damn, well I guess I can write about keeping this Melvin guy’s decks good in a competitive meta. Who the hell is Melvin, anyway?

(Spends twenty minutes using the internet to read up on Melvin for the first time ever.)

Huh… I guess I’m Melvin.

Well, at least that should make this easier.

I've been a melvin all along? What else haven't I known... HOLY HELL I'M AN ANIME GIRL! WHAT!?!?!

I’ve been a Melvin all along? What else haven’t I known… HOLY HELL, I’M AN ANIME GIRL!? WHAT!?!?!

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This entry is part 3 of 7 in the series Up! Your! Deck!

378127_10150441621792624_1477312954_n“Maybe I should make Polukranos? He’s new and shiny,” Bruce muttered as he scrolled down the list of mono-green legends on Gatherer.

“What are you doing, Banner?” Thor asked him, pulling up a chair and looking over his shoulder at the computer screen.

“Trying to pick a new general to build. But I don’t know, there’s so many options. I could do Thrun, the Last Troll, or Omnath, locus of Mana, or maybe green Kamahl…” Banner trailed off as he continued to stare at the screen.

“Well, what sort of criteria does your general have to meet?” Thor inquired.

“Just two things,” Bruce said as he settled on a picture of Silvos, Rogue Elemental. “It has to be big, and it has to be green.”

The ability to smash is not a prerequisite. But it would be viewed as a positive.

The ability to smash is not a prerequisite. But it would be viewed as a positive.

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