This entry is part 21 of 26 in the series Staple Remover

Posted by Chris-B
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Twitter – @0hn0s3

It’s time to finish off my mono colored deck building series with the one remaining color, red.  Red is all about getting the job done without subtility and planning.  It wants to smash and blast its way to victory while shocking and awing its opponents.  It is basically the Michael Bay of colors.  That is why I am presenting you the Michael Bay Super Action Mono Red Deck. BOOM! Action! BLAM! Magic Cards. KABOOOM!

The general of choice here is going to be Bosh, because he is a giant face ripping robot.  So now that we have one robot in our Michael Bay Super Action deck we are going to increase the synergy of the deck by adding in even BIGGER smashing blam explodabots:

Wait, those robots are blastacular but we also need that huge wrecking Transformer killbot that rampaged Chernobyl in one of the Transformer movies and didn’t even think twice about it:

We got that covered (*explosion*)!

Now I am sure you are asking yourself, how is this deck going to win any games or frighten any of my opponents unless I am smashing things with other things?  A great question!  The key to any successful deck isn’t synergy or strategy its EXPLOSIONS:

The second most important element to any successful deck is smashing things with other things.

One fact is for certain, this deck is going to have things in it.  So why sit around when we can pick those things up and beat people over the head with them?  Showing off your Japanese foil Mycosynth Lattice is one thing.  Picking it up and pummeling someone’s face with it is on a whole other level.  Don’t just let your cards sit around looking pretty, make them work for you.  I made sure to include Liquimetal Coating.  Why?  So that you can turn Koth of the Hammer into an artifact, have Bosh pick him up and wield him like a sword, then throw your Koth sword for 4 more damage right into your opponents dumbfounded maw.  This is the Michael Bay Super Action Deck and it is sick and tired of value engines, rules lawyers and card advantage.  When your opponent asks you why you are playing mono red in EDH, don’t say anything, just use Liquimetal Coating to turn Bludgeon Brawl into an artifact, equip it to a Darksteel Colossus and Bludgeon them with a Bludgeon.  There is no time for questions when piloting this beast.

But wait there’s more!

We need Transformers.  Huge hulking metal husks that stomp and slam after transforming from some harmless looking pile of metal.  We got room for another robot:

Here’s the game plan, we use Karn to turn Spine of Ish Sah into a robotic monstrosity, then use the Coating and Brawl to take Koth and equip it to the Spine.  Now instead of Koth hurling mountains at people he is being forcefully WIELDED by one.  If someone asks what your win condition is tell them it’s a metal mountain with a Sword of Koth and Hammer.  Why stop there?  If you had Bludgeon Brawl, Karn and Mycosynth Lattice out, you could turn the Lattice into a creature and then equip all of your mountains to it.  What would this accomplish?  Nothing!  It would only shove in a lot of action and completely lose track of the plot.  You know, just like Michael Bay does it.  Which brings me to:

Explosions!  In case you forgot we need some big random explosions.  What better to do the job than a card called Kaboom!  We have some high mana cost trinkets in this deck so odds are someone is going to get a big CGI explosion all over their life total.  What is a Michael Bay movie without a major city taking some heavy damage?  We need some big beasts to take chunks out of the side of some architecture:

In this deck we want everything to be an artifact, because artifacts are mechanical and mechanical things are designed to rupture and explode.  Once everything is an artifact, then the Hellkite can swoop in, knock the Empire State Building over and win you the game.  If your opponents don’t like the movie you are making and decide to get rid of some of your game winning artifacts, just equip your dragon tyrant with an entire Caged Sun and Fling the whole mess at their face.  Roll Credits:

Creature [25]
1 Goblin Welder
1 Arcbound Ravager
1 Slobad, Goblin Tinkerer
1 Junk Diver
1 Aladdin
1 Arcbound Reclaimer
1 Lodestone Golem
1 Solemn Simulacrum
1 Hoarding Dragon
1 Karn, Silver Golem
1 Duplicant
1 Hellkite Tyrant
1 Hoard-Smelter Dragon
1 Moltensteel Dragon
1 Wurmcoil Engine
1 Hellkite Igniter
1 Bosh, Iron Golem
1 Platinum Emperion
1 Mycosynth Golem
1 Steel Hellkite
1 Darksteel Colossus
1 Steel Overseer
1 Kuldotha Forgemaster
1 Summoner’s Egg
1 Myr Battlesphere
Instant [2]
1 Fling
1 Chaos Warp
Sorcery [7]
1 Metallic Mastery
1 Trash for Treasure
1 Wheel of Fortune
1 Geosurge
1 Reforge the Soul
1 Gamble
1 Kaboom!
Artifact [26]
1 Darksteel Citadel
1 Great Furnace
1 Mana Vault
1 Sol Ring
1 Voltaic Key
1 Grim Monolith
1 Liquimetal Coating
1 Sculpting Steel
1 Worn Powerstone
1 Clock of Omens
1 Krark-Clan Ironworks
1 Thran Dynamo
1 Blinkmoth Urn
1 Gauntlet of Power
1 Gilded Lotus
1 Caged Sun
1 Mycosynth Lattice
1 Spine of Ish Sah
1 Darksteel Forge
1 Doubling Cube
1 Extraplanar Lens
1 Prototype Portal
1 Nim Deathmantle
1 Mimic Vat
1 Trading Post
1 Rings of Brighthearth
Enchantment [3]
1 Bludgeon Brawl
1 Stranglehold
1 Gratuitous Violence
Land [36]
1 Ancient Tomb
32 Mountain
1 Valakut, the Molten Pinnacle
1 Temple of the False God
1 High Market
Planeswalker [1]
1 Koth of the Hammer

Well that finishes off another season of Commandercast for me.  I hope you all enjoyed reading Staple Remover.  I will be returning next season to bring you more deck lists and Commander tech, albiet in bi-weekly form.  Until then keep your tech janky and your builds original.

Series Navigation<< Staple Remover 20 – Super Shattergang Bros. 3Staple Remover 22 – Five Cards I Invented for the Meta >>